Recently I discovered that my amazing cousin Hannah started a YouTube channel about her pregnancy and trying to conceive. I was watching her videos, and she had one where she talked about coping with trying and trying without the results a couple might want, and something she said about goals really got me thinking about my life. (And no, my boyfriend and I are not yet ready to be parents)
She mentioned that it's good to have multiple goals, some small, some big. Some that may seem trivial and others that are huge and life-changing. And this rang so true for me. When it comes to my goals (or what I have previously defined as goals), they're all pretty huge, and each day, week, month that goes by without success can really beat down my spirit. Sure, I may have done the dishes and gone to the gym, but I still don't own a house. I pay my bills on time, but I'm not planning my wedding.
Cue the epiphany from Hannah. If I have one or two huge goals that I base my success and happiness on, each day I fixate on them is a day I have failed. And that is not healthy. I need to find success in each day, and that way, just because I "failed" to buy a house that day, I won't see myself as a failure day to day. I am being a bit dramatic with calling myself a failure - I don't actually see myself that way. However, I do get a bit defeated when I notice that I'm 26 and my friends are getting married or buying houses or having babies or...
So how do I fix this? I'm a list-maker. I enjoy being able to cross things off, because it signifies that I have accomplished something. If it's something "trivial", like painting my nails, it's still something that I wanted to do that day, so I have accomplished a goal! I need to shift my mindset, and see these small things as "goals". That way, I am a success each and every day, maybe multiple times a day, just because I checked something off the list.
Did I take Riker for a hike? SUCCESS! Did I do the laundry? SUCCESS! Did I sew something? SUCCESS!
I hope that I can quickly condition my brain into seeing that I am a successful human being, who finishes things when she puts her mind to it. And I can also find ways to create small goals that I can more quickly cross off my list that lead to success in my huge, lofty goals. Want a house? Put away a little money each month - It will add up, and is completely doable!
My lists (and sublists and sub-sublists) can be my recipe for a successful life. When cooking, you need to prepare your ingredients in the right order, with patience, and not just throw everything in at once. My goals are the same way. I won't magically be able to afford a house one day. It takes time, dedication, motivation, research and hard work. And so does that T-shirt quilt I've forgotten to work on for months. I need discipline, along with my lists, and then I can conquer any goal.